Chocolate Almond Date Balls


That’s what I’ve got for you. Balls.

Balls because I want to bake something, but I can’t figure out what. Everything sounds equally meh, so I threw these no-bake chocolate/nut/espresso/ball things together so I at least have something to snack on while I’m trying to figure out baking. They kind of taste like brownie bites, but in a healthy, Lara-bar-ish way, so I’m really not foolin anyone unless they’re coming off a long stint of being stranded in a fishing village in northern Alaska where wine-soaked herring is considered an acceptable dessert. I assume.

Anyway, these took all of 30 minutes to make and clean up, so. Jackpot for all those brownie-starved herring eaters.

  • 1 1/2 c. roasted salted almonds
  • 2 c. dates, soaked briefly in hot water if they’re dry (I had deglet dates, which are my least favorites, I bought them accidentally and the only way I was going to use them was to blend them into some shit.)
  • 2 tsp. instant espresso powder
  • 1/3 c. unsweetened cacao powder

Add the almonds into food processor and pulse until they’re pretty finely ground up. Then add everything else and let it spin until it’s basically dough. I used my cookie dough scooper to get similar-sized dough balls out. And that’s it. Store your balls in the fridge.

Stupid Easy Lazy Stock

So. I’ve made the Bacon Wrapped Buffalo Jalapeños from PaleOMG a couple times so far. Which is maybe saying something because that recipe is, like, A MONTH OLD on her site. Whatever. They’re delicious. And they give me the perfect excuse to make stock.

I cut the tops off the jalapeños before I stuff ’em, because I screwed it up the first time and it didn’t destroy the recipe. And then it turned into a positive, because now this stock calls for:

  • 1 rotisserie chicken carcass. I hate the word carcass.
  • The tops and seeds of 11 jalapeños
  • The ends of green onions
  • 1 additional onion
  • Cilantro, or whatever herb is starting to give me the side-eye in the fridge
  • 2 Tbsp. black peppercorns

Throw everything in a pot. Just barely cover with water and simmer for an hour. Strain your liquid into containers and chill. Strain off any fat or grease before using. This also freezes super well.

*I also do this basically any time I roast a chicken. Throw whatever random vegetables I have, whatever herbs I have and a couple tablespoons of peppercorns in with the damn carcass, cover with water and just let it chill on the stove for an hour. It’s easy. And it’s delicious. I particularly like it with the jalapeños, though. Went really well with my Turkey Chorizo + Vegetable Soup. I don’t know if the jalapeños I got were extra spicy, but DANG.